The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

I went to see a Radiation Oncologist at the advisement of my Breast Surgeon today.  My surgeon said that he didn't think I would need radiation, but that it would ultimately be the call of the specialist.  To my surprise, the Breast Navigator was there.  I was so thankful for this, because I had showed up to the appt. alone.  She kept me company and helped me understand what the doctor and nurses were telling me.  At first, the NP came in and explained exactly what radiation entailed.  What the appointments would be like and what radiation involved, etc.  She was so detailed it began to worry me. So, I asked her "does this mean I'm definitely getting radiation?"  She said that I'm a "candidate" for it, but that the decision is up to me...if I don't want to do it, I don't have to.  This confused me a little, but luckily she was just a "prep" before the doctor came in.  As soon as the Doctor came into the room he told me "You do not need radiation!"  WOOHOOO!  Oh my gosh, I was soo relieved!  Radiation is a scary thing, especially when you have implants.  It interferes with the implants and the scar tissue.  I was very worried about that.  The doctor continued to explain why he felt that I didn't need it and wouldn't benefit from it.  However.......the bad news:

As I explained in a previous post, my initial breast MRI showed my tumor at 2.9cm, after chemo I received another breast MRI which showed the tumor size at 2.1cm.  The point of chemo is to rid your body of the residual cancer and shrink any tumors.  Most of the time, the tumor will shrink so much it can't even be seen.  So, since mine only shrank 0.8cm, this was extremely disappointing.  It basically means the chemo didn't work.  Therefore, the Radiation Oncologist said because of my age and the aggressive nature of my cancer, he thinks I should try another/different regiment of chemo.  He said most patients will do chemo AFTER the surgery anyway (instead of before like I did).  Soooo, he said he's going to talk to my Oncologist and get back with me about what they decide on whether I should do more chemo (eek!).  I'm conflicted about this option because obviously chemo is nothing fun.  It's awful, I will feel bad (possibly even worse than before), I will lose my hair again (which has just started to grow back), I will have to miss more work, etc.  BUT, I want to do everything possible to make sure that this cancer is completely gone and does NOT come back.  I want to exhaust all my options and make sure I do everything I can to get back to good health and stay in good health.

Because of the extensive history of cancer on BOTH sides of my family, they also want me to see a geneticist.  The following cancers are in my family history: bladder, liver, breast, skin, prostate, cervical, and lung.  The doctor couldn't believe it today when going through my family history.  He was astounded!  So, that appointment will be interesting.  Hopefully it will give me good news and not bad.  But she's booked until December, so I'll have to wait a while for that.

Please keep me in your prayers, especially while I await the decision about more chemo.  Also, while I heal from the initial reconstruction surgery, head towards the final reconstruction surgery, return to work at the end of October, and see the Geneticist.