Disappointed

I had another Herceptin treatment on Friday and met with the Oncologist.  I hadn't seen the Oncologist in probably 2 months.  I had been seeing his NP every time I'd been going in for a while now.  He gave me some disappointing news.  I had a breast MRI post chemo to check the progress of the chemo and the size of the tumor.  The original size was 2.9cm.  The current size is 2.1cm.  The Oncologist was disappointed with these results.  He said that he was expecting the tumor to have shrank much more than that with all the chemo I received.  He said that my cancer is strongly Her2 positive as well as strongly estrogen positve.  Therefore, either one could be the driving force for this cancer.  Apparently, since the tumor didn't shrink very much, it appears that estrogen much be the driving force.  (If it was the Her2, the chemo would have worked better since I'm getting Herceptin)  Soooo, in other words all that chemo was pretty much pointless.  I lost my hair, had all those horrible side effects, and missed all that work for nothing!!!  It's very discouraging!  However, he said that because it looks as if the estrogen is the driving force, the Tomoxafin I will be receiving as the end of all of this will do the trick.  The upside is that this news make me more confident in my surgery decision to take them OFF!!

Surgery Decision

    I met with my plastic surgeon last week and discussed what a mastectomy with reconstruction would entail.  I had a consultation, looked at some pictures, and asked a lot of questions.  I left the appointment more confused and concerned than before, however.  There were a lot of questions that he couldn't answer for me, but then there were also a lot of decisions I needed to make that I wasn't aware of...decisions with a lot of different options.  In the following week I was so overwhelmed and frustrated every time I would try to think about it and think of the options and try to make a decision, that I would just cry and push it out of my mind.  I eventually got to the point where I said "I'm not going to think about it again until my appointment on Tuesday."  Well, luckily I have some great people in my life, including a co-worker who is a survivor, who talked with me and calmed me down, as well as my nurse Navigator who is WONDERFUL! 
   Today, I met with my breast surgeon and asked him the questions my plastic surgeon couldn't answer.  We went over all the options, discussed them thoroughly, and what the benefits were of each.  I asked my Nurse Navigator to sit in with us, to help me make the decisions I needed to make; and along with the help of my Dad, we all came to a general consensus.  Drum roll please.....................A nipple-sparing double mastectomy with implant-based reconstruction!  That's a lot of big words, so let me break it down for you.  I will have 99% of both breasts removed.  Only 1% of my breast tissue will remain which will mostly be skin and a small layer of tissue under the skin.  They are going to save my nipples (YEAH!), and then place temporary implants under a layer of muscle.  I will go in once a week for a few weeks and have those implants filled with fluid to expand the implants to the desired size.  Those implants will stay in for 3-6 months, then they will be replaced during a second surgery with the permanent implants.  With this surgery my breasts should look exactly as they do now!  They are hoping to make the incisions under my breasts near my ribs, instead of around my nipples.  If that is the case, there won't even be any visible scars!  I am SOOO happy with this decision.  With this decision I will not have to worry about bi-yearly exams, plus there is a much lower chance of reoccurance.  The biggest downside is that I'll lose most of the feeling in my breasts and nipples.  I am so relieved to have made these decisions and am looking forward to the surgery on August 29th.  Please pray for my Plastic Surgeon Dr. Stahlnecker and my Breast Surgeon Dr. Nate.  They will be joining together for the surgery.  I will be spending 23hrs at the hospital.  The surgery itself will take approximately 6hrs.  It will be done at Community North Surgery Center.